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Sunday, February 5, 2012

Daycares Make Me Nervous





OK, I'll admit it...I'm scared of daycares.


Maybe it's because I'm a paranoid first time mom. Maybe it's because I watch too much news, or simply that I've heard too many horror stories.



I was still active duty military when I had Baby Girl. I was extremely lucky, too. Not only did I get 6 weeks of leave to heal and take care of my baby, but they let me take an additional 2 weeks on top of that because my PPD (postpartum depression) was so bad. I know a lot of people aren't afforded that luxury and to this day I am so very grateful for the help I received.

Still, being active duty meant I couldn't just stay home. I couldn't call up and quit, or hand them my two weeks notice. I had to go back to work eventually. It was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. Even with both incomes, finding daycare we could afford wasn't easy. Finding daycare we could afford and I felt comfortable with was next to impossible. The truth was, I wasn't comfortable with anywhere. I didn't feel as though I could trust anyone to take care of my child.

Huzzy went back out to sea shortly after Baby Girl was born, so finding a daycare was left to me. I was so scared.

Children were dying in day care. Day cares have lost children. Some of the day care workers are even abusive towards these poor kids.

Yes, I know that there are wonderful, safe day cares. I know there are fantastic people that will care for your child and do everything by the books. I understand this logically. In my heart though, I've never been so panicked about leaving her somewhere.

After a lot of looking, research and calling around I found a daycare that I felt alright with. I was still nervous, but I felt like I could trust them. Thank God my Bestie came to visit that week. She was the one that made me drop Baby Girl off at the daycare and walk away. She was wonderful and supportive, and didn't bat an eye at my sudden panic attack 2 hours later. Bestie just saw the look in my eye, got in the car and went with me to go make sure my daughter was safe.

I never did have any problems with the daycare we chose. In the beginning I would use my lunch break to run back and check up on her. She was always fine. In fact, as time went on and I got to know the women even better, I began to feel completely comfortable leaving her there while I went to work. I finished my time in the military when Baby Girl was 8 1/2 months old, and I've been home with her ever since. She drives me crazy, but I feel incredibly blessed that I can be here with her.

There are a lot of steps that go into finding a good daycare, and it's pretty easy to find a basic list. I used the one on BabyCenter, as well as a long list I was given from Fleet and Family's visiting nurses.

The only I can say is trust your gut. And check references. It's a scary thing trusting someone else with your child, but sometimes that's what you have to do.


Is your child in daycare? How did you choose which daycare to put them in?


3 comments:

  1. I know exactly what you mean! My daughter was 6 months old before the money ran out. She had colic so bad...I couldn't hardly trust myself around her let alone someone else. When it was time for me to go back she had been diagnosed with MSPI and was so much better. We went through 3 day cares before I found the one I really liked. It was the same daycare I used for 5 years. Where I took my baby boy after he was born. Then she closed :( I had anxiety through the roof. Thankfully there was a brand new child care center that opened in the same shopping strip that fiance works in. It's worked out great!

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    1. That stinks that the daycare you were using closed, but at least you found another good one you can trust! It's so hard to trust your kid to someone else. So sorry your little one had colic. :( That's just a nightmare for everyone involved. Way to hang in there, mommy!

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  2. Hi there! Following you back ~ thanks so much!!
    With my daughter (who is now 12) I had to go back after only 2 weeks!! Thankfully I had close family & a bevy of friends I trusted to help me out. When it was time for me to actually put her in somewhere, she was 9 months old & the sister of one of my good friends had just opened an in home daycare. With my son (almost 4) I was fortunate enough to stay home for 2 1/2 years! Our church has a daycare in it. I started by just going part time/drop in for about 6 months before actually starting full time. I am on the board for the daycare so if I have an issue, I have no problems bringing it up!! It's definitely NOT an easy process finding good childcare.

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